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"She would sleep, she would wake, she would walk, and she would climb over my shoulders where she lives" said the sweet woman sitting in my therapy room.
"she is evil and her hair is a mess, I just wish she combs her hair before she crawls over me" then she added while gazing down to her feet in desperation. Then she raised her face slowly, looked back up with piercing eyes grinding her words in a powerful assertive voice "do not believe this wimp, my hair is not a mess"
No, that was not an act from "The Haunting of Bly Manor", this was a live scene with a real client in my therapy room.
It was a lazy Day at work; I was quite satisfied as I witnessed two of my clients that day recording a steady progress and I was so ready for my last appointment of the day. Then walked this sweet middle age woman, let's call her "Carol", a new client, she came an hour early, sat in the reception area hiding in her washed out face and little body.
She began telling her story, a trauma at work that brought her to me; she got in legal troubles as a result of someone else's mistake. When her employer realized what happened, they did their best to apologize compensating her financially and paying for her legal and psychological harm.
The woman seemed depleted; she described herself as a person who is too weak against life, lost every battle and every dream she ever had. Then she gazed down, and came back with evil eyes, harsh voice, and rough language, asking me to call her "Sara".
As a practitioner, I studied Dissociative Identity Disorder and its treatment techniques; however coming that close face to face to DID was definitely intriguing. It was a long minute my brain needed to process what was happening, recalling all what I know about the disorder, and drafting treatment plan in my head.
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Then it hit me, all what I need to do is to be fully present at this moment for this beautiful woman who got so abused that her psyche shattered into pieces. Techniques and protocols come later, now it is time to be connected and compassionate for this soul. The less of me, the more of her.
Sara (Personality B) shared a lot about herself and her importance in Carol's life (personality A) protecting her. Carol dared to differ, there was a bit of tension between them before we managed to have a nice chat the three of us.
All was going well, until Personality C decided to make an entrance. A little girl who came sucking her finger asking if I think she is pretty enough. Yes it was quite a full house by the time we were wrapping up.
As she was ready to leave, she looked at me, she sighed, said in a fainted voice "are we going to be alright?", a striking question that showed the light at the end of the tunnel, this is an exceptional moment where all her personalities are agreeing and wanting the same thing, to get better.
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